


Not Okay But Happy

by Smartasslittlesteve



Category: Newsies (1992), Newsies - All Media Types, Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: Abuse, Alcohol, Blood, Child Abuse, Estelle is Buttons sister, Everyone Is Gay, Gore, I'm Sorry, Implied Sexual Content, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, M/M, Miscommunication, Neglectful Parents, Original Female Character - Freeform, Passing Out, Physical Abuse, Swearing, This Was Supposed To Be A One Shot, and a queen, drinking mention, glass bottle used as a weapon, it will get better, not sleeping, the poor boy get real hurt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-07
Updated: 2019-01-05
Packaged: 2019-09-13 07:00:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 15,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16887828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Smartasslittlesteve/pseuds/Smartasslittlesteve
Summary: When every day is a fight for survival its hard to be happy, but when life seems to be kicking Buttons while he’s down, his friends step in to help give him the life he deserves. And if he falls in love in the process, well he wasn’t going to complain.





	1. Fake Happy

“Hey Pops,” Buttons greeted quietly, as he reached into his back pocket and pulled out his pape money from the day, dropping it into a small tin can on the kitchen table.

 

“John go to the store with Maggie and Estelle, I want ‘em to know what to gets so I don't gotta tell them e’ry damn time,” Buttons’ father spat, throwing some money to the oldest.

 

“Alright Mags! Elle! We’s going to the store c’mon,” Buttons called as the two Eisinberg girls flew down the stairs, nodding to their father as they followed Buttons out the door.

“J J, can we go visit mom??,” Maggie asked, the nine year old hanging off his arm as the three closed the door.

“Of course,” Buttons smiled as his sisters lit up with joy, practically dragging him to the small tailors where their mother worked.

“Mom, you here?” Estelle asked as the three walked into the shop.

“Elle is that you dear?” Laura asked walking out of the back, she stopped and planted a kiss on each child's forehead as she got to them. “How have you guys been doing, how’s your father?” 

“We’ve been doing good! Taking care of each other, Pops been okay, I guess, better than he was when you left, so he's getting better,” Buttons shrugged.

“That’s good, which reminds me, if you have time on Sunday can you three, Alvin, an’ Jasper come over for the day and help me out around here,” Laura asked, giving the three a smile as theirs grew.

“We’d be delighted to Ma’ anyways I hate to cut this short but Pops asked us to go to the store and we really don’t want to be late getting home,” Buttons smiled apologetically as his mother nodded, giving them all one last forehead kiss before ushering them out the door.

“Okay, so we go to the store every Thursday, we pick up Pops drinks, some bread, eggs, and whatever kind of meat is cheapest, as well as anything else I need for dinner, which when you guys start going on your own I’ll tell you the day before, got that?” Buttons explained, receiving exuberant confirmations from the girls. “Alright, then imma let you two go shopping and then I’ll make sure you got everything,” Buttons laughed as his sisters immediately turned and ran to different parts of the store to get the items.

 

The trio walked home, their faces hurting from smiling and laughing as they walked through the door.

“J, is that you?” Jasper, Buttons youngest sibling called from upstairs.

“Yeah it’s us, what do you need buddy?” 

“I got hurt…” the seven year old trailed off as the three reached the top of the stairs, Buttons assessing his brother.

“How did this happen?” Buttons asked looking at the shards of glass stuck in his baby brothers shoulder and foot. 

“Bottle,” Jasper mumbled, leaning into Buttons as he picked him up and carried him to sit on top of the dresser.

“Mags, can you go under my bed and grab me my first aid kit, Al grab something I can put the shards in, and Elle come hold Jasper’s hand,” The three immediately sprung into action with their older brothers orders, getting everything ready to help their youngest sibling in seconds.

“Okay bud, this is gonna hurt okay, squeeze Elle’s hand if you need to okay?” Buttons tried to reassure the child before grabbing his tweezers and pulling out the glass shards as cleanly as possible, dropping them into a rusted tin can Alvin brought as he went.

“Okay we’re done with that, now we’re going to head over to the tub so that we can make sure we wash out any little bits,” Buttons quickly lifted Jasper, carrying him to the tub and quickly rinsing out his wounds. He pulled out a bottle of pure alcohol, pouring a little bit onto a rag and getting to work disinfecting the myriad of cuts.

“I need to stitch up a few of these, then we’ll wrap it up and you should be good as new,” Buttons made quick work of sewing up the larger cuts, and wrapping them up.

“Dinner will be ready soon, I’ll call you guys down once it’s ready,” Buttons quickly kissed Jasper and Maggie on the head before heading down the stairs, cooking dinner so that it would be ready before he had to leave to go clean up at Jacobi’s later.

 

“Buttons, can I sleep with you?” Alvin whispered, Buttons smiled to himself slipping into Alvin's bed with him, having already given his blanket to Maggie and Estelle.

A few minutes later Buttons felt the bed dip beside him as Jasper curled into his other side, the three of them slowly drifted off to sleep together, nightmares starved off for at least the night. 

 

“Cuba gains independence from Spain, you heard the story right here folks! The battle of the century taking place right outside our very borders!” Buttons called trying to sell off his last pape before school started shoving his change in his pocket as someone bought it. 

Buttons sighed to himself before starting his trek towards the school, already debating if today was the day he was going to shell out his hard earned money on some coffee just so that he could make it through the day.

“Why does being tired exist? Why can’t I just have energy?” Buttons whined, leaning on JoJo while they waited in line for the evening papes. 

“Hey Buttons, is you going to hang out at the lodging house tonight?” Mush asked. 

“Nah I gotta work at Jacobis tonight and my dad would kill me if I skipped making dinner,” 

The next few days felt like years as they dragged by. Between Alvin having a nightmare, and Buttons not being able to sleep, he just wanted Sunday to come, but there was two days of work left before any kind of reprieve could be found. 

 

“Hey Buttons is you okay? You’se been real off the last few days?” Kid Blink asked laying his hand on Buttons shoulder.

“F-fine,” Buttons said quickly, the fog in his head making it hard for him to even form the word.

“You sure? Y’know you can talk to us, we won’t judge ya," Mush assured.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m...perfect,” the words stumbled out as Buttons crinkled his eyebrows trying to think. “I, uh, I gotta get home,”

“Awww c’mon Buttons, we barely get to see you anymore you’se always havin to rush home or ta school, just for a half hour...Please?” Mush pouted pulling his best cute face.

 

“N-no see you tom-,” Buttons started shakily standing up from the ground. His vision swimming, the floor swaying under his feet as he stood. 

“Are you sure you’se okay? You look real pale,” Blink held his hand out getting ready to catch Buttons.

“Entirely I-” Buttons started stumbling as he tried to take a step, he heard the muted shouts of the others as the floor got closer, and closer-

Blink shot forward, catching Buttons in his arms before the boy hit the ground. 

“Oh my god is he okay?” Mush asked.

“I dunno, Let's’ just get him back to the lodge,” Blink said.

 

“Hey Specs!” Mush called to their resident doctor.

“Hey-Is that Buttons?” Specs asked as he got to the staircase.

“Yeah, he just passed out when he got up,” Blink explained shifting the weight of the boy in his arms.

“Can you get him to a bunk?” Specs asked moving out of the way as Blink picked up Buttons bridal style and carried him up the stairs, laying the boy down in his and Mush’s bed.

“Okay, ummm what do we do now?” Blink asked pulling the blanket up to cover him.

“Well I know what’s wrong, he looks exhausted, I can’t believe he made it all day,” Specs noted, looking at his clammy skin.

“We asked if he was okay and he said he was,” Mush looked at Buttons guiltily.

“Just make sure he sleeps,” Specs sighed adjusting his glasses.

“Will do, thanks Specs,” Mush plastered on a smile as Specs left the room, before sighing and looking at Blink. “Why would he lie to us?

“Maybe he just didn’t want us to worry?” Blink offered, unsure of the idea.

“I guess,” Mush pouted, resting his forehead on Blinks shoulder, wrapping his arms around his waist “I just wish he knew he could talk to us,”

“Yeah, so do I,” Blink wrapped his arms around Mush, pulling him into a tight hug.

“He hasn’t been himself lately, and he’s always runnin off soon as his papes are sold,” Mush rambled, nuzzling his face into the crook of Blinks neck.

“Somethin’s wrong,” Blink said quietly, stealing a look at the sleeping boy.

“I’m scared Lou,”

“It’ll be okay Nick, I promise,”

“But what if it’s not Lou, what if he’s hurting?” Mush asked, his voice cracking.

“We won’t know until he wakes up,” Blink planted a reassuring kiss on Mush’s temple.

 

The first thing Buttons thought when he woke up was that he was screwed, he didn’t get to work, he didn’t get home-oh god he didn’t get home, his dad was going to kill him. “Well, it’s not like I can go home until after I finish selling the evening pape so…” Buttons mumbled to himself as he got ready, speed walking out the door in an attempt to avoid the other boys when he heard Mush behind him.

“Buttons wait up! You gonna come sellin with us today?” He asked bounding towards Buttons.

“Yeah, yeah okay,” Buttons smiled fondly as Blink joined them in the line.

“You sleep alright?” Blink ruffled Buttons hair as he spoke.

“Yeah, best in a while,” Buttons laughed as he fixed his hair and put his hat back on.

“Yay! I’m glad!” Mush cheered as they walked away with their papes.

“So, we gonna sell or what?” Buttons asked smirking as he shoved his papes into his bag.

“Hell yeah!” Blink exclaimed.

“Language…” Mush chastised teasingly.

“Bite me,”

“You wish,”

“Wait what?” Buttons tilted his head like a confused puppy.

“Nothing!” Mush covered Buttons ears, giving Blink a warning glare.

“Okaaaayyy?” Buttons looked even more confused.

“C’mon! Papes to sell!” Mush grabbed both boys hands, dragging towards their selling spot. 

 

The day passed by in a haze of anxiety and delight, unfortunately all good things must come to an end and before he knew it, Buttons was walking in the front door. 

He crept through the house, hoping to get upstairs before his dad heard him, he could never be that lucky could he?

“Where were you?” His dad sneered, grabbing the back of his neck harshly.

“I fell asleep at the lodging house and none of the boys woke me up,” Buttons tried to explain, his voice growing quieter as the hand around his neck tightened more. “I didn’t mean to I-“ Buttons was cut off by the burning of a cigar at his neck, he screamed, tears brimming in his eyes as the pain hit.  The cigar was pulled away, but the relief didn’t last long. Green glass shards filled Buttons’ vision as the bottle was smashed over his shoulder. The tiny bit of beer left seeping into his wounds making them burn.  Before Buttons could even comprehend the pain from the glass he was being pushed to the ground, his fathers foot flying towards his face, hitting his nose and his jaw before moving onto his ribs and stomach, after what seemed like years his father kicked his left arm away from his body, slamming his foot down on Buttons digits, one by one.  After one last kick to the nose his father finally walked out the front door, leaving his son bleeding on the entryway floor, slowly fading out of consciousness. 

  
  



	2. The Mighty Fall

            Estelle slammed her fist on the lodging house door, panting hard after sprinting here after her brothers first scream. A boy with glasses opened the door, tilting his head as he examined her.

            “It’s John, uh Buttons! He’s hurt, he needs someone to help him!” She shouted tears rolling down her face as she thought of Buttons blood curdling scream. 

            Mush felt like someone threw ice water over him, panic setting into his veins “Where is he!?”

            “He’s at home, I-I don’t have time to explain, but he needs help,”

            “If he needs first aid then I’m the guy to do it, let me get my stuff and we’ll go over,” Specs stated grabbing his first aid kit.

            “Okay, Blink and I will go with you!” Mush decided already pulling on a jacket.

            “No you guys stay here, I know you’re worried but, he probably doesn’t want a bunch of people crowding him, I’ll go and we’ll bring him back here,” Specs motioned for them to sit back down.

            “He knows us!” Mush defended himself, looking to be on the verge of tears.

            “I know Mush, but we don’t know what kind of shape he’s in, just please, trust me, stay here,”

            “Okay. Bring him back please,” Mush conceded, leaning into Blinks embrace.

            “I will,” Specs saluted before turning and taking off with Estelle to the Eisenburg home. 

            “He’ll be okay, right?” Blink asked quietly as the two sat back on the couch.

            “Yeah I mean, she probably made it seem worse than it is because she was scared, right, that’s how it works?” Mush desperately tried to make the situation better.

            “Yeah, yeah right,” Blink sighed pulling Mush closer, burying his face in his chest.

            “He’ll be okay, he’s too strong to get hurt,” Mush continued to ramble.

            “Yeah, yeah he is,” Blink muttered, not fully hearing Mush’s words through his panic.

            “Specs’ll be back soon and then we’ll know he’s okay,”

            “Yeah,”

            “Plus, now at least we’ll know why he’s been off and we’ll be able to help him," Mush started to play with Blinks messy blond hair, his mutterings becoming unintelligible.

 

            “Wait!” We uh need to go in through the window up there, there’s a ladder but if dads downstairs and he sees that I was out…," Estelle trailed off dropping Specs wrist leading him to the ladder and they both ascended crawling in through the window in time to hear the front door slam. 

            “Pops gone, let’s get John up here before he comes back,” Alvin said as the three descended the stairs, Maggie and Jasper sitting in the bathroom so they didn’t have to see what shape their brother was in. 

            “Oh my god,” Estelle choked out looking at her brother. Blood covered his face, green shards of glass covered the floor around him, some caked in the blood pouring out of his arm. 

            “His hand…” Alvin was crying as he looked at the mangled finger of his brother, each finger broken and bent in horrifying angles. 

            Specs was the first to break out of the trance, picking the injured boy up and carrying him upstairs, resting him on a bed that had been stripped of blankets. 

            “I need a bucket of water, an empty container and a rag,” Specs ordered, pulling out his first aid kit and opening the small one Estelle handed to him. He made quick work of cleaning out the glass shards the way the siblings had seen Buttons do a thousand times.

 

            Specs spent about an hour, fixing Buttons hand, stitching up his cuts and cleaning the blood off of him, he instructed the three siblings to go to their mothers seamstress shop while he takes Buttons to the lodging house so that he could keep an eye on him, telling Estelle to come with him to the lodging house so she could explain to him everything that had happened.

            “Is he okay?” Mush asked once Specs reentered the living room after laying down Buttons.

            “How is he?” Finch asked.

            “You’d better say he’s okay,” Blink demanded, threatening fate more then Specs.

            “He’s alive, I can't say much more than that until he wakes up,”

            The chatter in the room stopped abruptly, everyone feeling sick as they thought of Buttons not making it.

            “What?” Mush squeaked out, his face drained of colour

            “What happened?” Tommy Boy was the first to speak up.

            “Well, medically speaking he has a broken nose, four finger on his left hand are broken, he has lots of bruising and small cuts on his torso, a bunch of cuts caused by a glass bottle...and..," Specs trailed off afraid to say the last thing on Buttons laundry list of injuries. 

            “And what?” Mush almost cried.

            “A burn...on the back of his neck...from a cigar…” the boys all held their breath, all of them knowing what cigar burns meant but hoping against hope that they were wrong.

            “I’m gonna kill whoever did it,” Blink muttered, hugging Mush closer.

            “Estelle, you don’t have to, but, could you tell us what happened, only if you want to,” Specs offered.

            “Buttons didn’t come home last night, and he only came in after selling the evening papes, and...and,” Estelle hicupped, trying to compose herself before she continued, “Pops, wasnt happy about it, he yelled and stomped around all night, throwing Maggie and Alvin around a fair amount, and when John-Buttons came home, he...he, he snapped, he hurt him really bad, I could hear him screaming from down the block, and there was so much blood,” At this point all of the newsies were in one state of distress or another, Tommy Boy and Finch were both sobbing into Albert’s shoulder while their boyfriend just stared at the wall, tears streaming down his face. Davey was holding Jack as close as he could, stroking the boys hair as jack broke down in his arms, Mush was pale, his eyes the only thing showing his emotions, a mix of pure rage, and heartbreak, even Blink was bawling with the rest of them as the thirteen year old recounted the story.

            “G-god,” Mush sobbed out, his voice muffled by Blinks chest. 

            “Do your siblings have a safe place to stay?” Race asked.

            “Yeah, I dropped them off with Ma but she can only take in the three of them, she doesn't make enough money for all of us,” 

            “Well you guys are staying with us then,” Elmer voiced what everyone had thought.

            “We can’t Buttons is the only one who works and pops takes all his money as soon as he gets home, we have nothing,” Estelle lamented.

            “Well, we’ll just have to get the money back,” Blink said, fire in his red puffy eyes.

            “How would we do that?” Crutchie asked.

            “Well one old man doesn’t stand a chance against a bunch of us,”

            “Okay Race, Mush, Blink, Romeo, Specs, you go with Estelle back, don’t let anything happen to her, grab things that their siblings could need too," Jack decided motioning to each boy as he spoke.

            "I should stay put, in case Buttons get's worse," Specs leaned back in his seat.

            “Okay JoJo you go instead,” Jack ordered, pointing to the boy.

            “Kay!”

 

            Twenty minutes Blink, Mush, JoJo, Romeo and Race were following Specs and Estelle back to the Eisenburg property.

            “Oh my god,” Mush froze in the doorway, staring at the blood and shattered glass on the ground by their feet. 

            “Let's go steal some stuff from the kitchen, kay Mushy?” Blink proposed wrapping the shorter up in his arms.

            “Is all this blood from earlier?” Romeo asked as he joined Estelle upstairs to gather all of the children's belongings.

            “Yeah, there was more, but Specs threw away all the rags that were bloody afterwards,” Estelle sighed as she grabbed a bag from under a mattress and started going through drawers and looking under the other mattresses, throwing items in the bag as she encountered them. Romeo got to work grabbing and folding up all the blankets and pillows, making them as easily transported as possible. The quiet rhythm was interrupted however by the front door slamming open.

            “Who the hell are you people and why are you in my house,”

            “Ahh you must be Mr Eisenberg, I’m Racetrack, second in command of the Manhattan Newsies, and very close friends with your son,” Race stated, taking pleasure in the fear that flashed in the man's eyes.

            “How the hell did you get into my house‽”

            “I let them in,” Estelle spoke from the top of the stairs. 

            “Wait till I get my hand on you you little-“ he was cut off by a hand on his shoulder, he turned to look at the owner but before he could catch a glimpse he was punched in the face. Mush shook his hand out before stomping on the mans face. 

            “That’s for hurting Buttons, I hope you rot in Hell,” Mush spat,

            “Get back here you little-”

            “You stay the Hell away from him,” Blink yelled, shoving him to the ground and kicking him in the ribs.

            “I don’t know what you thought gave you the right,” Mush seethed, squatting down beside his head, “But i’m taking it away. You’ll never see any of them again, and if you do, I will know,”

            “And you will regret it,” Blink finished before stepping back allowing each of the guys to land a hit on him.

            “And this is for the years of abuse you put us through,” Estelle finished, destroying his hand the same way he did to her older brother. The group quickly gathered their spoils of war, following Estelle to her mother’s residence so they could catch the rest of Buttons family up on what happened. 

 

            “Elle, how is John and who are these people?” Laura asked as the group walked through the door. 

            “I’m Race, second for the Manhattan Newsies, these are my boys Blink, Mush, JoJo, and Romeo . We just finished up taking all of Button-Johns belonging back from their father, and giving him what he deserved,” the other boys smiled at how Race took responsibility. Laura immediately hugged all of the boys thanking them for helping her son, while Estelle gave Jasper, Maggie and Alvin their belongings. 

            “We’re not sure how Buttons is right now, but as soon as we know we’ll send a messenger over, probably Tommy Boy, to update you. We’re also dropping off most of what we stole so that you can take care of these three a little more easily, and if you need to drop them off all of us at the lodging house would be more than happy to take care of them for a while,” Race spoke as the other five dropped off the items they were leaving behind in the back room. 

            “God I hate that guy,” Mush’s fists were clenched in a white knuckle grip.

            “I would party if I saw he was murdered,” Blink agreed.

            “Dance on his grave,” Mush laughed a bit as they got back to the lodging house.

            “Guys, Buttons is waking up,” Finch yelled from the bunk room doorway as soon as the group got back.

  
  



	3. Scars to Your Beautiful

        “Mush, I know you and Blink wanna go in there, Estelle and I will just pop in, make sure he’s okay, and that he’s okay with visitors then people can come in,” Specs said as he ran upstairs with Estelle.

“Buttons, do you know where you are?,” Specs asked. 

       “Ughhh, Not-not home?” Buttons asked, his voice hoarse, presumably from screaming. 

       “No, look around Buttons, you’se safe,” Specs coaxed.

       “Specs? What’re you doin’?” Buttons squinted up at him.

       “Making sure you’se alright, you was out for a while,”

       “H-how long, did I miss work?” Buttons asked looking scared.

       “About three hours, and no, you didn’t miss nothin,” 

       “Good, I gotta get up,” Buttons struggled to push himself up, his face scrunching in pain.

       “No, Buttons you got hurt real bad, you gotta stay down," Specs explained, running his thumb over Buttons uninjured arm. 

       “Its just a bunch a’ cuts,” Buttons shrugged.

       “Buttons,”

       “Specs,”

       “Do you know where you are?” Specs asks again, taking in the fear in Buttons eyes.

       “Not home, and otherwise I don’t really care,”

       “Buttons I need you ta tell me, if ya don’t know thats okay,”

       “Fine,” Buttons admitted defeat, “I don’t know, I don’t care, I need to work,”

       “Do you remember what happened to you?” Specs asked trying to distract Buttons from his mission.

       “No, not really. Was it bad? I feel like it was bad?”

       “Yeah John, it was real bad,” Estelle spoke up, her voice cracking from restrained sobs.

       “What happened?” Buttons asked, ice setting into his bones as he saw his sister crying.

       “Pops, got real mad that you weren’t home last night,"

       “Oh,”

       “John, you was hurt real bad, there was so much blood, and you was in so much pain,” Estelle cried as she spoke, hiding her face in her hands.

       Buttons struggled to sit up a little. "Hey, it's okay, I'm okay now, see?"

       Estelle dove into his arms, hugging him tight “I was so scared J J,"

       Buttons hugged her tightly. "I'm okay now, and we are never going back,"

       She giggled lightly, “I think your friends might have made sure of that,"

       "What happened?" Buttons asked raising an eyebrow at Specs.

       “We went back home to steal a bunch of stuff and pops came home, and the pretty one, Mush I think, punches him in the jaw and told him that is he ever came near any of us again he’d know and then the hot one, Blink? said he’d make him regret it," Estelle explained, seemily happier.

       Buttons' face turned red. "First why are you calling them that and second what on Earth?"

       “I’m callin em that bc Mush is pretty and Blink is hot, and we decided Pops wouldn’t be needing too much no more," Estelle said darkly.

       Buttons sighed. "I just hope that he don't come after us.,"

       “Oh I’m sure your friends scared him away for good,”

       “Yeah, I guess. So I guess you guys know, don’t you?” Buttons looked away from the trio, tears shimmering in his eyes. 

       “Yeah we knows, we ain’t gonna treat you differently Buttons, you’se our brother,” Finch walked to the other side of the bed, crouching down so he could look Buttons in the eyes as he spoke. 

       “But you know how weak I am now,” Tears were streaming down Buttons face as he broke eye contact with Finch, folding in on himself. 

       “Yeah we know how weak you are, not at all, Buttons you are one of the strongest people in this damn building,” Jack spoke from the doorway. 

       “No I’s not, you guys don’t get it, I was soaked! I didn’t even fight back…”

       “Buttons you’se isn’t the only one who lived through that, and it sure as hell don’t make you’se weak, it’s a different kind of soakin’,” Race hugged Buttons, speaking into his hair as he carded his fingers through the thin brown locks. 

       “Thank you’se guys, I don’t know what I’d do without yous,” Buttons hugged back with his good arm. 

       “You okay with all the other guys comin’ in?” Buttons smiled lightly at Specs, before no dding.

       “Okay I’ll go let them know, they were real worried, especially Mush and Blink,"

“Hey bud, how you feeling?” Mush asked sitting next to him, Blink stayed standing, looking pale and fidgety. 

       “What’re you guys lookin’ scared for?” Buttons subtly tried to avert the attention away from himself.

       "You don't look so good," Mush mumbles. "Why didn't you say anything?"

       “Because I didn’t want yous to know how weak I am,”

       Mush doesn't think he breaths for a second. "We'd never think that..,"

       “Well it’s true, I mean it only happened because I deserved it, if I weren’t so pathetic then it wouldn’t have happened, it’s my fault,”

       Blink cautiously sits next to him. "Buttons, that's not true,"

       “Well do you have a better explanation?”

       “Your dad was awful, that’s why,” Blink rested his hand on Buttons shoulder.

       “He wasn’t always, he-he never hit me when I was little," Buttons voice got quieter as he looked at Mush’s heartbroken face.

       Blink nervously hugged him.

       “I’s sorry, I-i didnt want to make you worried, sorry..," Buttons melted into the embrace, tears starting to roll down his face.

       Mush sat on his other side and hugged him as well. No one would hurt him again, not while he had a say.

       “I’s sorry, you guys are probably mad that I lied, I-I understand if you don’t wanna be around me no more,”

       “Hell no," Blink says. "We're staying,"

       “Why?” Buttons whispered into Blinks chest.

       "Because you need people who care, and we care,"

       “Thank you, Mushie why are you crying?” Buttons leaned towards him.

       Mush wipes his eyes. "It doesn't matter. I'm just happy you're safe now.,"

       “Awww Mushie, don’t worry I’m here to stay, I ain’t goin nowhere," Buttons curled into their embrace, enjoying the comfort for a while “I loves you guys,”

       "We love you to," Blink says.

       “How long have I been making you’se worried?” Buttons draws in on himself slightly.

       "A few days.," Mush admitted.

       “Hey, you is here now and you're safe, that’s all that matters," Blink casually changed the subject.

       “Yeah, it’s been too long since I could say that,” Buttons yawned, cuddling into Mush and happily falling asleep sandwiched between Blink and Mush.

 

       “Lou...I, I have something I need to tell you, but I need you to know that I love you, and I do not want to leave you, but I, I think I might like Buttons too…” Mush folded in on himself, afraid of what Blink would say. His heart dropped when there was a beat of silence, fear starting to overtake him when a strong pair of arms wrapped around him. 

       “Mushie, I’m not going to be mad at you, I love you too, plus...I think I might feel the same way,” Blink whispered in his ear. 

       “Really?”

       “Really,”

       “We should talk to him about it, not now but soon,” Mush whispered, smiling at the boy between them.

       “We’ll let him heal first,” Blink decides.

       “Yeah, I love you Lou,”

       “I love you too Nicky,”

       Blink was ripped from his sleep by the boy in his arms jerking around. Tears shone on his cheeks as he whined, his face contorted in pain. 

       “Buttons, hey wake up, you’se havin’ a nightmare,” Blink lightly shook the boy, jumping back as he jolted upright with a scream. He froze for a moment looking around before he broke down in tears, Mush immediately sat up followed closely by Blink. 

       “Hey Buttons you’se safe, it’s alright, just a nightmare,” Mush spoke as Blink rested his hand on his shoulders, the two of them coaxing Buttons back to a laying position. 

       “Do you wanna talk about it?” Blink asked pulling Buttons towards him. The boy simply shook his head, burying it further in Mush’s chest, while Mush played with his hair. 

       “You’se safe baby,” Mush mumbles after Buttons had fell asleep. 

       “You’se adorable,” Blink smiled, giving Mush a peck on the cheek before they fell asleep. 

 

       “G’mornin," Mush greeted, slowly waking up.

       “Morning you two," Blink said, pulling them closer. A smile graced his lips as Buttons yawned, looking perfectly content being smushed in the middle.

       “You guys sleep well?” Mush asked, playing with Buttons hair as he nodded, relaxing into the feeling.

       “What about you Blinkie?”

       "I slept great," Blink slurred, still half asleep.

       “That’s good! So, today’s Sunday, so there’s no evening pape today, so what do we wanna do with our free time?” Mush asked, being insufferably cute for how early it was.

       Blink smiled. "Maybe we could eat out? Or making something here?"

       “Hmm well eating out is more expensive, but I also have no idea how to cook, so it would be up to you guys,” Mush shrugged looking at the other two. 

  
“I can cook if you guys want, it might not be great because my hand is messed up but I can try,” Buttons offered looking dejectedly at his left hand.

       Blink shook his head. "I'll cook, you need to rest. And we should probably set your fingers,"

       “Yeah, Specs set them once but I’m pretty sure I screwed at least my pinky up again,”

       "Okay, can we get Specs to do it again because I don't know how," Mush grimaced sounding mildly distressed.

       “Yeah, but later I don’t want to get up yet,” Buttons shrugged off the injury, burrowing deeper into the blankets.

       "Buttons, if you want your pinky to work, we need to do this fast," Blink said gently.

       “Finne," Buttons whined blowing his bangs out of his face.

       "C'mon, let's get you to Specs," Mush helped him sit up.

       “Bleh, my ribs hurt," Buttons complained scrunching his face up adorably.

       Blink sat up, keeping the blanket bundled around Buttons.

       “You guys I can get up by myself,” Buttons whined, his blush and grin destroying any sense of actual annoyance.

       "Humor us?" Mush asked.

       “Of course,” he smiled widely at the two.

       “I’ll go get Specs, I’ll be right back,”

       “You’re lucky dude,” Buttons leaned back on Blink, resting his head on his shoulder.

       "How so?" Blink asked, knowing full well how.

       “Because, you and Mush are the most amazing people I’ve ever met, you guys are perfect together, and you’re lucky to have each other,”

       Blink smiles a little. "Guess I am,"

       “I hope that someday I can have someone even half as amazing as either of you,”

       'If only he knew' Blink thought to himself. But did Buttons even want them like that?

       “Anyways, I’m in a good mood for once so I’m probably going to be aggressively loving and supporting everyone, especially you two," Buttons changed the subject.

       Blink smiles. "That'll be great,"

       “Nah it’ll probably be really embarrassing to be honest, but I don’t really care right now,”

       "Great!"

       “How is me embarrassing myself great?” Buttons teased, raising his eyebrows.

       "Well not that, that you don't care,"

       “Okay that’s fair," Buttons conceded as Specs and Mush walked in. Mush sitting down and holding Buttons, knowing that it would hurt.

       Buttons grabbed Blinks hand, leaning into Mush’s embrace as Specs examined Buttons broken finger. Buttons tried not to freak out as he felt the bones in his hands being moved.

       “Okay there you go, all done, I’m going to splint your fingers so that you don’t mess them up again,” Specs said, setting an ice pack on Buttons hand.

       “You’re doing great baby,” Mush whispered in Buttons ear, knowing Buttons probably wouldn’t hear him through his pain.

       “That’s, not as bad as I expected,” Buttons said finally looking at his hands as he blinked away tears.

       "It's okay, see?" Blink says gently. "You'll be okay,"

       “Yeah you’se right,” he buried his head in Blinks shoulder, “sorry you had to do this again Specs. Haven’t even been here for twenty four hours and I’m already an inconvenience, that’s gotta be a new record,”

       "Buttons, you're not a inconvenience," Mush says almost harshly.

       “Sorry you’re right I’m sorry,” Buttons squeaked our curling in on himself.

       "Buttons, no, please.," Mush shut up, feeling terrible. He messed up, and now Buttons is scared.

       “Hey Mushie it’s okay, I’m just a lil overwhelmed because of the pain right now, it’s alright,” Buttons held Mush’s face with his good hand, forcing him to look at him.

       Mush nervously met his eyes. "Doesn't make it right,"

       “Maybe not but you didn’t mean to scare me, so I don’t have any reason to be mad,"

       Mush shook his head. "I still shouldn'ta done it,"

       “Can I have a hug,” Buttons asked knowing Mush won’t forgive himself for a while.

       Mush hugs him as tight as he dares, as does Blink.

       “I love you guys," Buttons confessed, silently hoping they took it as platonic.

       "We love you too," Blink replied.

       “Anyways now that my fingie is set we should get ready to go selling," Buttons said, wiping away tears.

       "No we, you are staying in bed and resting. Get better, that's your responsibility,"

       “Blinkie, I can’t miss a days pay,"

       "You're hurt, we'll cover you," Mush pleaded.

       “I’m not that hurt, Specs tell them I can go selling,"

       "The contrary. You are staying in bed,"

       “Nooooooo, I’m that hurt, it’s just a couple scrapes and bruises," Buttons whined.

       "And broken fingers. And ribs. And burns,"

       “Yeah, that’s only a couple things,"

       "Enough that you aren't getting up. I still haven't looked at the burns," Specs ended the argument.

       “They’re not that bad, it was only a cigar burn,”

       "Only he says. Let me look at it," Specs spun his finger to indicate to Buttons to turn so he could see his back.

       “Psss fiiiine," Buttons huffs before reaching up and pulling his shirt off, wincing as he moved.

       Mush winced at the sight of Buttons skin. Blink nervously took Buttons' hand.

       “Hey it’s been worse I’m alright, they’ll heal, in a little bit they’ll just be scars left,” Buttons tried to comfort them.

        "Worse?!" Specs asked.

       “Yeah?” Buttons looked confused at his outburst.

       "That's it, we're protecting you," Mush decided as he and Blink wrapped him in tight hugs. 

       “What why?” Buttons asked tilting his head but melting into the embrace nonetheless.

       "Because you've been hurt enough," Blink said.

       “If you say so,”

       "We don't say so, we know so," Mush corrected.

       “Alright, plus it’s not like any of them will be distinguishable from all my other scars later,"

       Mush checks and sees he's right. "God, Buttons.," He chokes out, bringing his hand to his mouth.

       “They’re just scars,”

       "You were hurt bad though," Blink said softly.

       “Everyone gets soaked, I’m not special,"

       "Not this bad," Mush spoke, his voice strained from holding back tears.

       “It doesn’t matter,” Buttons lied, trying to get them to stop worrying.

       "Yes it does, this isn't just once or twice," Blink clung to him tighter.

       “Well it’s better that I got hurt, I’d rather get hurt then have any of my sibling have to deal with it," Buttons tried to shrug it off, feeling worse as Mush closed his eyes, looking away from him. “I’m sorry I’s bummin you’se out,"

       “Don’t be sorry,” Blink rubbed his hand up and down Buttons back.

       "I feel bad, I don't wanna make yous sad,"

       "Johnie, we're worried. That's different," Mush used Buttons real name as he looked at Buttons.

       "I know, but still, I don't wanna be the reason you'se not happy,"

       "You make us so happy, a little bit of sad, especially for this, is worth it," Mush took Buttons hands, looking him in the eye.

       A dark blush dusted Buttons face as he smiled "Awww you guys, okay well if you is sure,"

       “We are,” Blink confirmed.

       Buttons held his face in his hands smiling brightly as he looked at his lap, Blink reached out and took Mush’s and Buttons’ hands, Mush grabbed Buttons other hand and completed the circle.

       "Okay, as much as I hate to break this, you two need to go selling, I'm not making you miss a days pay, I'll see you guys in a bit," Buttons sighed after a few minutes, dropping their hands so he could give them both a hug.

       “We’ll be back soon, promise,” Blink said, ruffling Buttons hair as everyone but Buttons vacated the Lodge.


	4. Partners in Crime

       Buttons smiled watching the door close before flopping back into bed, "Uhhhh, why do I have to have feelings for the two people who are in the most perfect relationship? There's no way they'd choose me over each other," he whined dramatically. "Why am I asking no one? well because I can't tell anyone because it's insane," ‘And illegal,’ he thought to himself.

      "Ughh I just wish I could sleep for a hundred years and wake up in 2000, I bet things will be better than...Two hundred years maybe.. could be nice, or maybe reincarnation exists and I can just restart later in the future with Mush and Blink…” Buttons blushed as the two crept back into his thoughts again, “Ugh stupid feelings..I'm probably awful for cuddling with them all the time. They should focus on each other.. maybe if I give them reasons to care...? yeah, if I prove to them that I deserve to be cared about then theres no reason to feel bad about it! I could help them out with stuff I guess, make sure I’m always there incase something happens, and oh! I got it! I just need to make sure I never make them sad or worried again! I gotta hide stuff.. But it'll be worth it. Plus, they don't need to be bothered with my problems, and I’ll be able to help with theirs! They’re gonna be so happy!” Buttons smiles. "Maybe they'll even love me," 

      Buttons flails slightly, excitement filling his mind, his hand covering his mouth, "They might love me!! Oh my god! That would be amazing!!” Buttons could feel the tears welling in his eyes as he was overwhelmed with happiness. He can't stop his happy wiggles and hand flaps. He's happy, and no one will see.

      Buttons couldn’t stop giggling and flapping his hands, slowly coming down from his euphoria, ‘Maybe I can surprise them! But how? Maybe I can clean up! That’s something I can do right! I have years of experience of making things look perfect’ Buttons smiles, getting to work on making the Lodge look its best.

He flapped his hands quickly, stopping when he heard voices outside of the door, quickly freezing and getting back to the last bit of cleaning ‘I can't do that around other people. It's not normal, I gotta be normal,’

      The voices got closer and the door opened revealing Mush Blink and JoJo, Buttons beamed, silently praying they’d comment on his hard work.

      “Woah, there’s a floor in here, I haven’t seen that in a while,” Blink joked as he walked in.

      “Buttons did you clean up in here?” Mush asked his grin mirroring Buttons.

      Buttons nods. "Yep! I cleaned up everything!"

      “Awww Johnie, that’s so sweet!” Mush hugged Buttons.

      Buttons hugged him back, joy bubbling again. But he kept himself still.

      “You is amazing Buttons, one day here and you’ve already done more then half the boys have done in a month," Blink joined in on the hug.

      “Awwwww you guys," Buttons absolutely melted at their praise.

      "Let us adore you please," Mush asked.

      Buttons giggled into Blinks shoulder “okayyyy,"

      Blink and Mush collectively decided that his giggle is adorable.

      “So anything interesting happen while you was out?” Buttons asked after they had migrated to the couch.

      "Nothing much. We missed you though," Mush leaned his head on Buttons shoulder.

      “Me?” Buttons tilted his head, scrunching his eyebrows as he questioned the other boy.

      "Yeah, we missed you with us," Blink explains.

      “Awww really?”

      Mush nods and Blink rests his chin on Buttons'  other shoulder.

      “You guys, you’re gonna make me blush," Buttons said as if his face weren’t already scarlet.

      Mush smiles. "Awwww but you're so cute!"

      “You’re cuter,” Buttons retorts, booping Mush on the nose.

      Mush blushes as well. "But you're cuter,"

      “Nu uh, you’re the cuter one!”

      "We're both cute but you're adorable," Mush smiles at the absurdity of the mock argument.

      “You’se also adorable,"

      "Fine we both are. But you're more so,"

      “Nope, Blink back me up here tell your boyfriend he’s more adorable than me," Buttons asked expecting back up.

      "You're both adorable in your own ways, I can't compare,"

      “I am wounded, this is a betrayal in the highest regard!” Buttons joked, dramatically draping himself over both of their laps, holding his hand over his heart.

      Blink laughed at his dramatics and Mush couldn't stop smiling at how adorable he was being.

      “You’re a dork," Blink said once he contained his laughter, reaching out and ruffling Buttons hair

      “You two are amazing,” Mush mumbles leaning his head onto Blinks shoulder, now that his previous head rest was laying on his lap. Blink throws one arm around Mush leaving the other draped across Buttons waist.

      Buttons didn’t think he’s ever been happier, leaning into Blinks embrace he smiled as stared up at the two.

      They can't believe they have Buttons in their lives. Mush wraps one arm around Buttons as well.

      “What did I do to deserve knowing you two?” Blink asked.

      "Existed," Mush stated immediately.

      “Being yourself," Buttons adds.

      Blink smiles. "I'm glad for both then,"

      “Awwww Blinkie," Buttons brought his hand up to his mouth, hiding his huge smile.

      "Aw, c'mon, don't hide your smile!" Blink tried to get him to lower his hand.

      “It’s ugly though," Buttons giggled trying to avoid Blinks attempts.

      "No it's adorable!" Blink insists and Mush nods in agreement.

      “Fine,” Buttons cautiously lowered his hand away from his face, his smile never fading.

"See I told you it's ugly," Buttons moved his hand back to his face.

"Nope, nope you are equal to Mush and Mush alone," Blink shook his head as he spoke.

      “Thats impossible Blinkie,” Buttons smiled brightly at the praise.

      "Nah. You two are on a level of your own,"

      "Really?” Buttons raised his left eyebrow.

      “All by yourselves,”

      "Lou, you are just as beautiful, as Buttons," Mush leaned closer to Blink and pulled Buttons slightly closer.

      "Fine, three of us on a level by ourselves,"

      "I can live with that," Button casually lowered his hand away from his face.

      Mush smiles widely. "I can to,"

      "You two are so cute," Blink said looking at them.

      "You're cuter," Mush says.

      "You is both cuter," Buttons couldn't believe his luck.

      "Nope, you're cuter than me, both of you are. I'm the hot one, you're the cute ones,"

      "Yeah I'd say that’s accurate," Mush said.

      Buttons nods, perfectly happy being held.

      "You look content," Blink joked looking down at Buttons who was nearly falling asleep in their laps.

      "I am content," Buttons mumbles, half asleep, slowly dozing off.

      "He's adorable," Blink said, smiling at Buttons.

      "My puppy," Buttons mumbles in his sleep.

"Awwww, whats happening with your puppy baby?" Mush asked

      "I don't wanna share.," Buttons curls a little tighter.

      "Who's making you share your puppy?" Blink asked trying not to wake him up with his laughter.

      Buttons doesn't really respond, just a few too quiet mumbles.

      "See Lou, some people can be cute when they sleep talk, unlike you,"

      "Excuse you I have awesome dreams. But yeah he's adorable,"

      "Oh really, last week you pointed to the corner of the room and said, and I quote 'Don't make the crows mad, they have the barbed wire' so yeah you is creepy when you sleep talk," Mush gestured wildly as he talked.

      “It was an awesome dream!” 

      “It was terrifying,”

      “No it wasn’t!”

      "Maybe for you!"

      "Fine..,"

      "Nu uh I don't want your ponies," Buttons mumbled.

      "See you're not afraid of whatever is happening, it’s adorable, you're sleep  talking makes me nervous," Mush giggled. “You just don’t have a sense of humour if you think that's funny,”

      “Mush.," Blink gives Mush a Look™ raising his eyebrow sceptically.

      “Okay, I lied.," Mush admit still smiling, “You is hilarious, but your sleep talkin isn't,”

      “Better,” 

      “Love you Blinkie,”

      “Love you too Mushie,” Blink smiled, pecking Mush on the lips.

      “He’s been sleeping a lot,” Mush commented as Buttons shifted in his sleep.

      "He's gotta be exhausted," Blink said softly.

      “Yeah, it probably doesn’t help that he spent all morning cleaning instead of sleeping,"

      "He's catching up on rest, and that's good,"

      “As long as he’s happy I’m happy,” Mush smiled softly

      “Me too,” 

      “Ugh I think I’m reading too much into things,” Mush grumbled, tucking his head into Blinks shoulder.

      “How so?” Blink smiled running his fingers through Mush’s curly hair

      “Because he’s said he loves us and that he’s saying he wants to make us happy and he’s really cuddly, but he’s also just a tactile person so he probably doesn’t actually want to be with us,"

      "Maybe. Or maybe he does?" 

      “Did he say something to you?” Mush pulled his head off of Blinks shoulder to look him in the eye.

      “No, but...I can hope,”

      “Yeah, that’s all we can do for now, once he’s doing better than we can bring it up, plus it’s enough for me that he’s happy,”

      “Yeah he’s happy and that’s what matters,” Blink smiled. The two continued to quietly talk between each other occasionally stopping to great the other newsies as they walked in, slowly joining the growing buzz of conversation.

      “I know Buttons has only been living here for a day, but you guys always look so much happier when he’s around," Crutchie observed smiling at the three.

      Blink smiled a little. "He just has that effect,"

      “Yeah, whenever he’s around, it’s just easier to smile,” Mush added, Crutchie gave them a knowing smile before joining Elmer and Specs in their conversation.

      “I think Crutchie knows,” Blink observed.

      "Crutchie knows everything,"

      “That’s true, honestly Crutchie could tell me anything and I would believe him,” Blink joked, laughing as Mush nodded. “How long should we wait before we wake him up?”

      "I dunno. Few more minutes maybe?"

      “Yeah, I just feel bad, he looks so peaceful,"

      "We could just move him without waking him up.," Mush offered.

      “Nah I think the guys wanna talk to him, plus we know everyone will respect it if he doesn’t want to talk, and then maybe we can go get something to drink," Blink suggested

      "Why does that sound amazing?"

      "Because I thought of it,” Blink laughed at Mush’s face “do we wake him now or..."

      “Wow he’s out cold,” Race commented as he walked into the main room.

      "You have no idea," Blink mutters.

      “Has he been sleeping all day?” Finch asked concerned.

      "No, he cleaned the house before we got home,"

      “Damn, he’s out here already being more helpful than Elmer’s been all week," Tommy Boy joked, earning a light slap from Elmer.

      “You know it’s true," Ike remarked.

"You can shuddup too," Elmer retorted.

      “Yeah, but are any of us good at shutting up?” Albert asked leaning on Elmer’s shoulder.

      "No," Buttons mumbled.

      “He lives!” JoJo yelled, causing Buttons to flinch slightly “Sorry,”

      "It's okay," Buttons said, being pulled into Mush’s side as he sat up, smiling happily, curling up and being smushed between the two.

      “How are you doing Buttons?” Finch asked, voicing what everyone was wondering.

      “I’m okay…”

      “That’s good! Specs how’s he doing physically?” Tommy Boy asked.

      "He should be resting,"

      “I was resting, you just watched me wake up,” Buttons yawned as he spoke.

      "More," Specs said. "As evident by your yawn,”

      “Ive been sleeping all day,"

      "Fine, just stay sitting please?"

      “Okayyyy, it’s so boring though," Buttons wined.

      "Even with us?" Mush asks.

      “It’s impossible to be bored around you,"

      “So uh Buttons, if you don’t want to answer that’s perfectly okay, but umm what happened?” Romeo asked.

      Buttons goes quiet, wishing he could sink into the couch.

      “If you don’t want to answer that’s okay, you don’t have to talk about anything if you don’t want,” Romeo attempted to comfort the clearly distressed boy.

      Buttons nods, still hoping the couch will eat him.

      “Johnie do you want me Blinkie and Estelle to tell them or do you wanna wait for a while before you talk about it?”

      "Never, please never," Buttons begs something to come along and distract everyone, they're all staring at him.

      “Sup losers, are you ready to watch me crush Racer in poker?” Spot Conlon, and Buttons saviour asked as he burst through the door. Buttons sighed in relief and huddled into Blink's side.

      “It’s okay baby,” Blink said pulling him closer, the three disappearing from the room once everyone was distracted.

      “You alright?” Mush asked holding his arms out for a hug once the three were alone. Buttons immediately nodded and almost dove into his arms, instantly feeling safer in Blink and Mush’s arms.

      “Do you want them to know baby? If you want we can tell them without you there if that would be better?” Mush offered, trying to help the boy.

      “Okay honey, we’ll do whatever you need,” Blink added as he felt him nod.

      Buttons barely even noticed the little endearments.  He's scared.

      “Do you want to lay down?” Blink asked pulling Buttons closer, picking him up bridal style and carrying him to their bed when he nodded.

      “Is there anything we can do to help baby?” Mush asked cuddling  as close to Buttons as possible. Buttons just wants to be held for a while, without the pressure of keeping up a conversation.

      “Alright do you want Mush and I to talk to you, without you needing to respond?”

      Buttons nods. He swears his theory is right, that if he thinks something hard enough others will pick up on it.

      “You’re so brave, and strong Buttons,” Mush starts playing with Buttons hair.

      “You’re so amazing, being able to tell everyone that you couldn’t talk about it, not a lot of people have the strength to do that,” Blink adds wrapping his arms around Buttons waist.

      Buttons smiles a little more. They think he's brave, they think good things about him.

      “And your an amazing person, so kind and generous, always making people happy," Mush blushed lightly as he talks about Buttons.

      "And you're so helpful and sweet, and you care so much about others," Blink adds.

      “You always try to make sure everyone is comfortable and safe, even if it inconveniences you,”

      Buttons nods a little. Everyone comes before him.

      “You deserve everything in the world,” Blink adds, knowing Buttons wouldn’t believe it.

      “I know you probably don’t believe us, but you do, you deserve anything you could ever dream of,” Mush said, ignoring urge to kiss him on the forehead.

      Buttons smiles a bit wider. He loves them both so much.

      “Are you feeling better baby?” Mush asked.

      Buttons nods. "Yeah," He says quietly.

      “Do you want us to keep talking honey?” Blink asks, joining in on the pet names.

      Buttons shrugs. He doesn't want to annoy them, but he doesn't want them to stop.

      “It doesn’t bother us as all, if you want us to keep going we’d be more than happy to,” Mush adds sensing Buttons hesitation. Beaming as he felt Buttons nod against his chest

      “Alright you amazing beautiful human,” Blink smiled as Buttons face went scarlet.

      “You’re so cute when you blush, right Lou?”

      "Very right Nick, the cutest person I’ve ever seen,"

      "You couldn't be more right," Mush really wanted to kiss both of them right now. Blink and Mush shared a look, both of them knowing they were thinking the same thing, but should they? Will Buttons be okay with it?

      Mush settles on leaving a light peck of Buttons head, carefully watching the boys reaction.

      Buttons turns almost fearful, looking up at Blink scared of his reaction. Mush just kissed him! In front of his boyfriend! 

      “You..you aren’t mad?” Buttons asked slowly relaxing as he looked at Blink’s smile.

      “Not at all,” Blink smiled wider, pulling Buttons closer .Buttons accepted it, confused but not worried.

      Blink smirked deciding that they have nothing left to lose and also kisses Buttons on the head, making Buttons more confused, but mostly happy.

      “Are you okay with this Johnie?” Mush asked.

      Buttons nodded. He liked them both, a lot. This was what he wanted.

      “You one hundred percent sure?” Blink asked, still feeling unsure until Buttons nodded again.

      “Perfect!” Mush exclaimed trying to keep his voice down despite his excitement. Buttons tried his absoulute hardest not to wiggle but he can't stop a little wiggle.

      “You’re adorable,” Blink sighed fondly.

      “Such a cutie,” Mush agreed, each compliment making Buttons blush darker and darker.

      “You’re so blushie, it’s adorable,” Blink laughed as Buttons hid his face in his chest.

      “Nope, you is not allowed to hide your adorable face," Blink stated tilting Buttons head up to look at them.

      “Nope, you is not going to convince us with your puppy dog eyes," Mush booped Buttons on the nose as he tried to pout, causing Buttons' nose to crinkle a little.

      Mush just smiled, before deciding to take a risk and kissed Buttons on the nose, making him blush even worse.

      “You is the most amazing person Buttons,” Blink said.

      "You're both better," Buttons mumbled.

      “Impossible,"

      "Nah,"

      “Absolutely, I mean you and Mushie are even but it’s impossible to be better than either of you,” Blink nodded as he spoke trying to stay serious.

      "You're both better than me,"

      “Nope, Blinkie and you is even and you would tell me I’m wrong if I said I wasn’t also even, but we are no better than you,"

      “I don’t think I’m better than you..," Buttons mumbles into Blinks chest hoping they can’t hear him.

      Blink shakes his head. "You're at least as good as me,"

      “Why don’t you think you is as amazing as us Buttons?” Mush asks.

      "Because I'm not like you and Mush,"

      “That’s not a bad thing baby,” Blink said softly.

      "But it is bad.,"

      “No it’s not, nothing about you is bad,” Mush stated, hugging Buttons a little tighter.

      Buttons shook his head, silently begging they'll stop questioning it.

      “You’re amazing Buttons, I hope you can realize it eventually, but we won’t push you,” Mush said seeing that Buttons was getting uncomfortable.

      "Thank you," Buttons said softly.

      “No problem, so what do you want to do baby? We can go out to Jacobis and get some drinks if you want, we can go join the card games if you don’t want to go out, or we can just stay here," Blink listed off a few ideas.

      "Can we stay?" Buttons asks.

      “Of course honey, anything you want,” Mush said as Blink pulled them both closer.

      “Do you wanna talk about anything or just cuddle?” he asked.

      "Cuddle,"

      “Of course," Mush said smushing Buttons between them.

      “You happy like this?” Blink asks making sure Buttons was comfortable.

      “Very,”

      “Yay!” Mush cheers quietly, smushing Buttons even more. The boys lay there, quietly enjoying the bliss of cuddling, occasionally Mush or Blink would lean forward and kiss his head, each time making Buttons blush darker and darker.

      "Mush, he's like a tomato,"

      “He’s redder than Alberts hair,"

      "He's too cute,"

      “I’m not that reeeeed," Buttons whined trying to hide his face.

      “Yeah, you're redder,"

      “Reddest even,” Mush added with yet another kiss. Buttons turns even redder and can barely contain how excited he is. “You’re the cutest person ever," Mush said, tickling Buttons, who giggled wildly, trying to squirm away.

      “You can’t escape buddy," Blink said, joining in on the tickling, making Buttons laugh louder, still trying to get away or retaliate.

      “We’re inevitable,” Mush said, continuing to attack his sides

      Buttons managed to gasp out "Stop!"

      “If you insist,” Blink said, both of them immediately stopping at the plea

      Buttons caught his breath back. Mush looked at Blink in mild confusion as he blushed darkly.

      “Nothing," Blink stammers out, making Mush and Buttons both look concerned, “Nothing at all,”

      “Blink…”

      “Mushie would probably get mad if I said it..." Blink mumbled, making the other curious.

      Slowly it dawned on Mush as he realized what his boyfriend was thinking “Louis Balletti!”

      “Thats my name,”

      “I will not tolerate anything of that nature in this household! We already have to deal with Spot and Race tonight, I do Not need to deal with you too,” Mush scolded, earning himself a smirk.

      “I’m so confused,” Buttons whispered looking between the two.

      “Good,” Mush mumbled.

      “Well pretty much Race and Spot like to f-“

      “No! We are not discussing their personal activities,"

      “Fine, we’ll be well aware of it later tonight," Blink shrugged, chuckling at Buttons’ face of pure confusion.

      "OH MY GOD,"

      “What is happening?” Buttons asked

      "If you tell him I swear.," Mush threatened

      “Please explain,"

      “No,”

      “Whyyyyyyy?” Buttons wined.

      “Because no,” 

      “Aww cmon Nicky, doesn’t he deserve to know?” Blink used Mush’s real name to try and persuade him.

      "Yes but later,"

      “If by later you mean tonight when he learns the hard way,”

      "For god's sake Blink," Mush reached over and grabbed his cap, hitting his boyfriend with it.

      “Yknow you love me," 

      "I do, but Blink.,"

      “Fine I’ll stop,”

      “I don’t understand what’s happening,” Buttons whispered to seemingly no one.

      Mush held him tighter. "Good,"

      “I don’t understand what’s happening but I like cuddles,"

      "Cuddles then,"

      “Yay!” Buttons cheered sleepily.

      Mush noticed he was getting tired. "Sleep darling,"

      “But,” Buttons paused to yawn, “But I’ve been sleeping all day,”

      "And you've had a long week, you deserve the rest,"

      “But when I wake up I won’t get to spend time with you guys since I’m not allowed to sell,” Buttons rubbed his eyes.

      "Yes, but you need sleep,"

      “But I don’t wannaaaaa," Buttons whined, burrowing under the covers

      "Everything you're doing says 'I should sleep'," Blink laughed.

      “But I’m saying I don’t wanna sleep,”

      "Please,"

      “Just a few," yawn, “more minutes,” Buttons yawned out stretching as he did so.

      "Blink how did we get such a cutie?"

      “I don’t know Mushie,”

      "Whatever it was, keep doing it so he stays,"

      “Don’t gotta tell me twice,” Blink smiles stoking the sleeping boys hair.

      Mush smiles a little. "How on earth am I so lucky to have two amazing boys?"

      “I don’t know, but I wouldn’t change it for the world,”

      “Me either,”

      “I just hope he doesn’t exert himself too much while we’re gone,” Blink whispered.

      “Yeah, that’d be bad,” 

      “I’m worried about him, I mean, what if he decides he needs to do something while we’re out again?”

      "That could be bad, super bad.. Especially if it was something hard,"

      “Mhm, I don’t want him to feel like he needs to do a bunch of stuff just because he can’t sell,”

      "But how?"

      “I don't know Mushie I just don’t know, all I can hope is that he would believe us if we told him he didn’t have to,”

      Mush nods. "I guess,"

      “I have a theory, but I hope it isn’t true,"

      "Okay,"

      “I think that maybe he is always trying to do things for everyone to prove he deserves to stay and that he deserves friends, honestly it breaks my heart," Blink explained.

      “Mine too, I guess we’ll just need to do a real good job of makin’ sure he knows he don’t have ta,” Mush looked at the sleeping boy in his arms, pulling him closer, slowly letting sleep take over.


	5. Meant To Be

       Buttons woke up the next morning to an empty bed, slowly pushing himself up on his elbows he looked around to see none of the other newsies weren’t at the Lodge either, meaning they must be out selling. He sighed flopping back on the bed, already hating this stay at home thing. ‘What to do today?’ he asked himself, looking around the room to find some kind of chore he could do, eventually settling on dealing with the laundry, and getting to work. 

 

      “Hey J J whachu workin on?” Estelle asked joining her brother on the couch.

      “I noticed there were some rips in the guys clothes so I’m sewin’ em up!” he smiled, offering his sister a second needle and thread. She grinned immediately grabbing the needle and getting to work.

      “So how you likin’ bein’ a newsie Elle?” 

      “I’m loving it actually, Racer is hilarious, and I’m getting along really well with Smalls and Sniper too!”

      “Thats awesome, I knew you’d be a natural,” he ruffled her hair as he spoke.

      “Mhm, It’s fun getting to watch the races at the sheepshead! Though I still don’t get how Race is so good at choosing a horse to win,”

      “Oh we’ve stopped questioning it, I’m pretty sure its magic,”

      “Probably,” Estelle laughed as the man himself flopped on the other couch, followed by the door opening, revealing Mush and Blink.

      “Hey Buttons can we talk to you?” Blink asked.

      “Uh yeah of course!” ‘oh no they hate me they hatemetheyhateme’ Buttons thought as he stood, plastering a fake smile on as he followed them into their bunk room. ‘They don’t want me around no more they is tellin me I need to go,’

      “So Buttons the thing is we’re pretty sure you like us,” Mush asked hesitantly, scared of losing one of his best friends.

      “Uhhhhh yeah?” Buttons squeaked drawing in on himself, wishing the floor would eat him.

      “Okay that’s perfect, because we like you too,” Blink began taking a small step towards Buttons.

      “And we were wondering if you wanted to join our relationship?” Mush finished.

      “Wait, really?” Buttons looked up at the two, slowly looking them in the eyes, after finding no sign of a lie he broke out into a huge smile. “Yes! Oh my god yes!” 

      Blink immediately pulled his boys into a hug, standing there for minutes with them in his arms.

 

      “Spot cuddle me,” Race whined.

      “Alright get over here princess,” he replied pulling the blonde onto his lap, continuing to focus on his poker hand as he curled up into his side.

      “You two are really cute, Estelle commented from across the makeshift poker table.

      “Yeah, he may be annoyin’ but he’s a cutie,” 

      “Damn right I am,”

      “You is adorable babe,” Spot smiled.

      “Well you is hot,”

      “I know, I’m the hot one, yous the cute one,”

      “Racetrack are you getting my baby sister addicted to gambling?” Buttons asked as he walked into the room with Mush and Blink.

      “And winning,” Race mumbled looking at her sizeable stack of poker chips.

      “Y’know I won’t even try complaining, just make sure you don’t make her waste as much money at the sheepshead as you,”

      “That’s my turf anyway,”

      “I go selling with you dumbass,” Estelle rolled her eyes.

      “Point taken,”

      “Language!” Buttons squeaked out.

      “Wha’d I say?” Race asked as Estelle laughed.

      “Not you! Estelle! You aint allowed to swear! You’re an infant!”

  
“I’m two years younger than you,” 

      “Infant,” Buttons grumbled slightly as everyone laughed, “I can’t believe you people,” he sighed dramatically, draping himself across his boyfriends laps.

      “Looks like I’m ya good luck charm, eh Spotty?” Race teases as Spot wins the round of poker and everyone starts divvying out the winnings.

      “I’m just good,”

      “Mmmmm nope, it was definitely because I wasn’t playin so I couldn’t beat’cha,”

      “Okay maybe,” Spot admit quietly so that only Race could hear.

      “I mean everyone knows ‘Hatten is best at gamblin’ and I couldn’t keep takin’ your boys money,” 

      “Is that why you stay here?”

      “That and I can’t just up and leave, I’m Jack’s second,” Race said with a proud smirk.

      “And you is very good at that,”

      “Not as good as you,”

      “Well I am a king,” Spot smirked

      “Oh yeah? Then where’s your crown?”

      “I don’t have one, I have a cane,”

      “Yes and it makes you look like a goddamn pimp,” Race joked, poking his boyfriend in the cheek.

      “You is my cutie though,”

      “Aww I’m flattered,” He smiles, giving Spot a quick peck on the lips.

      “My lucky charm,”

      “Get a room!” Albert and Romeo yelled at the couple.

      “Oh shuddup,” Race called back, rolling his eyes fondly at his best friends.

      “You know you want to though,” Albert teased.

      “Who says I won’t later?” Race fired back.

      “Oh no one, we all know it’s inevitable,” Romeo replied just as quickly.

      “Just don’t moan too loud, some of us do wanna sleep tonight,” Finch smirked as he joined the teasing, dodging the poker chip that Race threw at him.

      “I’m so confused,” Buttons whispered to no one, trying to follow the conversation.

      “Good,” “Not good,” Mush and Blink reply at the same time.

      “Why not good?” Buttons asked, choosing to focus on Blinks answer.

      “Well because they is talkin’ about the fact that Race and Spot are gonna f-” Blink began getting cut off by Mush covering his mouth.

      “I’m also lost…” Estelle admit shyly.

      “I can’t believe my brother knows about this but you two don’t,” Davey sighed in exasperation, preparing for an exhausting evening.

      “Davey you are not allowed to corrupt these innocent children,” Mush glared cutely, covering Buttons ears.

      “Watch me, Buttons, Estelle, c’mon,” Davey instructed, pausing as Buttons shot Mush an apologetic look before following the strike leader.

      The three walk back into the room an hour later, Davey looking completely unashamed even under the Look™ Mush gives him.

      “I don’t get it why wasn’t I allowed to learn ‘bout that?” Buttons asked as he laid back down in his previous position, Mush just sighed as an answer as Race started yelling.

      “I can’t make innuendos and watch their faces anymore,” he whined

      “You still can, It just won’t be as fun,” Albert replied.

      “But that was the fun paaaaart,”

      “But now you can watch Mush’s face when one of them makes an innuendo,”

      “God you are so right that’ll be even better,”

      “I’m out here tryin’ to protect these children's innocence and now you’se usin’ me for entertainment,” Mush joked feigning hurt

      “Well it’s funny,”

      “You-you’re face is funny,” Mush tried to retort, pouting as everyone laughed “i’m tryin okay, not everyone is as good at being mean as you are,”

      “Yeah but Mushie being nice is your thing, if you started bein' an asshole then you wouldn’t be Mush,” Blink said.

      “Fair point," Mush relented, smiling.

      “Plus there’s a reason I didn’t fall for any of them,”

      “Blink…” 

“Mush,” Blink repeated in the same tone before kissing him on the nose, grinning as his boyfriend went red, “You are too cute,”

“You’re cuter,”

“Impossible,”

“Eh,” 

“Impossible,” Blink repeated before going in for a kiss, feeling Mush immediately smile into it. Blink finally pulled away after a moment, giving Mush one last peck before he pulled away fully, wrapping his arm around Mush as he leaned his head on his shoulder.

      “Who gave you two the right to be the cutest couple in existence?” Elmer asked.

      “And Buttons,” Blink smiled, kissing him on the forehead.

      “Wait! And Buttons!?” Tommy Boy asked excitedly. “Ha JoJo pay up I told you!” He yelled as Mush nodded while taking Buttons right hand. JoJo groaned as he reached into his pocket and tossed Tommy Boy a dime.

      “You bet on us?” Buttons asked.

      “Of course,” a chorus of voices answered.

      “How come nothing that happens in this damn house surprises me anymore?” Blink complained fondly.

      “No idea,” Smalls answered.

      “It definitely can’t be the fact that we’re all insane,” Albert joked, pulling a tired Finch into his lap.

      “I still can’t believe you got together before Romeo and Specs to be honest,” JoJo laughed as Romeo’s face went scarlet, Specs smiling softly.

      “I think we’re leaving out the fact that Elmer was eyeballing Ike from the moment he walked in,” Romeo teased, trying to get the attention off of him.

      “Aww you did?” Ike asked as Elmer blushed.

      “N-no…” He attempted to lie, hiding his face.

      “You did!”

      “Psssshhhh you don't have any proof?..," 

      “Your face is proof enough,” Ike smirked.

      “Okay fiiiiiine mayyyybe I was checkin’ you out a liiiiiiitlllle,”

      “You were?”

      “You just wanna hear me say it again,” Elmer whined.

      “I do,”

      “I wascheckin’yous out…” Elmer mumbled, going bright red as Ike kissed his nose, hiding his face in his shoulder, causing him to laugh.

      “Romeo strikes again! Settin’ yet another couple up,” Race yelled.

      “Shuddup,” Elmers voice was muffled by Ikes’s shoulder.

      “Never,” Race smirked, leaning to the side to flick Elmer’s knee, falling out of Spots laugh in the process and giggling as his boyfriend pulled him back. “Aww Spotty I knew you liked cuddles, no matter what you say,” Race teased kissing him on the cheek.

      “No, I just wanna keep you from hurtin’ yourself,”

      “Suuuuuuuure,” 

      “This is the gayest room I’ve ever been in,” Estelle commented, smiling as she brushed her curls out of her face.

      “Well half of us are variants of gay so,” Race shrugged.

      “And you’re all adorable,”

      “We know!” Mush cheered.

      “Nicky I’m tryin’ ta sleeeeeep,” Buttons wined from his boyfriends laps, pulling his blanket closer. Mush just smiled at his sleepy boyfriend, picking him up and pulling him into a hug, letting him drift off again, quickly followed by Blink on Mush’s other side.

      Across the room, Albert mirrored his actions pulling a sleepy Tommy closer, taking care to not wake up Finch.

      “Looks like e’ryone is fallin asleep,” Race commented looking around the room.

      “We should probably move somewhere that isn’t the floor if we want to not hate life tomorrow,” Spot suggested.

      “Carry me?”

      “Alright princess,” Spot conceded lifting his boyfriend bridal style, letting him nuzzle against his neck, “How do you manage to be cute, an idiot, and make sex jokes at the same time all the time?”

      “I’m an enigma,”

      “I didn’t think it was possible for you to use a word that advanced,”

      “I read the pape sometimes,”

      “You can read?” Spot replied instantly raising an eyebrow for effect.

      “Yeah…” 

      “I’m teasing baby,” Spot smirked as Race went in for a kiss, giving him a quick peck before pulling away, “You is so cute,”

      “I’m adorable,”

      “Yes, you are,”

      “Thank you!” Race grinned, Spot smiling back to distract him before dropping Race onto the bed without warning.

      “Spot!” Race yelped.

      “Yes Race?”

      “Why’d you drop me?”

      “Cause I got to your bed,” Spot answered, humor dancing in his eyes.

      “You could’ve set me down!”

      “Yeah, but that’s not as fun,” Spot paused as Race groaned dramatically, “Plus you is adorable when yous scared,”

      “No I am not!”

      “Yes, you are,”

      “I was scared,”

      “And you was adorable,”

      “Nope, I was scared out of my wits,”

      “For a second, and it was an adorable second,”

      “Spot,” Race said seriously, crossing his arms.

      “Race,”

      “It wasn’t funny,”

      “I’m sorry…” Spot muttered.

      “Thanks Spotty,” Race smiled making grabby hands and curling into Spots chest as he laid down, wrapping himself around him.

      “You is adorable,”

      “And you’re hot,”

      “Oh obviously,” Spot mentally went through all of Race’s roommates, “So, all your roommates are out on the couch, what do you wanna do?”

      “I dunno,” Race smirked, trailing a slender finger down Spots arm. Spot leaned forward, capturing Race’s lips, his hand firmly holding his hips, feeling Race smile into the kiss as he prepared to enjoy himself.


	6. I Feel Like a 6/10

       The first thing Elmer wanted to see in the morning was certainly not Spot and Race curled up with each other, a thin blanket the only thing preserving their modesty.

       “Goddammit just one time,” Elmer muttered as he grabbed his overshirt and suspenders, taking them out of the room to get dressed. “I know we were expecting it but goddammit can’t those two keep it in their pants for one visit?” He complained as he walked into the living room

       “That’s askin a lot,” Finch yawned out, cuddling into Albert.

       “I know, but I just wanna grab my clothes without bein' scared of seein' more of either of em then I need to,” Elmer lamented receiving nods from the other boys.

       “Like damn sometimes I wish Race had his own room,” Finch added.

       “Where?” Tommy raised his eyebrows at his boyfriend.

       “That’s the problem there’s no space,” JoJo groaned as he flopped onto the open couch, effectively taking up the whole thing.

       “Well you look happy,” Mush commented raising his eyebrows.

       “Oh really?” JoJo’s voice was muffled by the couch cushion.

       “No, to be honest, you look dead inside,”

       “I am,”

       “What happened?” Romeo asked.

       “Does something need to happen?”

       “I don’t know I just thought somethin’ might’ve,” Romeo defended, laughing as JoJo groaned.

       “That sounds like something happened,” Buttons said.

       “Shuddup and let me be miserable,”

       “Do you want a hug, Jo?” Buttons held out his arms, smiling softly when JoJo looked at him.

       “Hug please…” He finally requested after a moment, sighing as Buttons walked over, pulling him onto his lap and wrapping his arms around him. “Thanks…”

       “No problem bud, I’m here if you wanted to talk about it, or if you just want comfort,” Buttons whispered to JoJo.

       “Comfort first please,”

       “Alright, whatever you need,”

       “So Spot and Racer are still asleep, but where is everyone else?” Elmer asked.

       “Hell if I know, Finch answered stretching.

       “Well, Jack and Davey are probably on the penthouse with Crutchie, other than that I have no idea,” Blink offered.

       “You okay over there?” Mush asked as Tommy groaned.

       “Yeah…”

       “Tired?”

       “Maybe,”

       “Is Al still asleep?” Romeo asked staring at the redhead.

       “And don’t wake him up,” Tommy said protectively.

       “You three are so cute,” Mush yawned out cuddling closer to Blink.

       “You guys are like the three that I didn’t think would work as perfectly together as you do, but you’re great together,” Romeo agreed.

       Finch just laughed, “I’m the humour, so is Albie, and Tommy is the adorable and the muscle,”

       “I don’t know Finchy I think you is pretty adorable too, and Albie is hot,”

       “You have a point Albie is especially hot,”

       “Even I can agree with that and he doesn’t even flirt with me,” Elmer agreed, earning a Tommy Boy Glare ™ until Finch elbowed him. “I’m not gonna try and steal your man chill,” Elmer smirked.

       “Y’know who else is really hot?” Romeo asked trying to keep Tommy from getting mad. “Blink,” Mush and Buttons nodded in agreement while Blink raised an eyebrow. “What I’m just stating facts?”

       “You’re stating lies,” Blink fired back.

       “Nope, he’s not,” Mush denied.

       “See, Mush agrees with me and he would never lie,” Blink smirked as he twisted his boyfriend's words.

       “I mean he wasn’t lying,”

       “Well, now you’re incorrect too,”

       “Nope,” Mush emphasized the p.

       “Maybe you think you is right, but you’re not,”

       “I am,”

       “You will never see  the truth will you?”

       “Nope,”

       “Unfortunate, you will spend your life lying to yourself,”

       “No, I’ll spend it convincing you,”

       “I think that was the cutest thing I’ve ever heard in my life,” Elmer said.

       “Yep,” Buttons nodded.

       “I’m pretty sure that’s their relationship in a nutshell,” Romeo said.

       “And with Buttons being with them now it’s somehow even cuter,” Finch added.

       “You guyyyyyys I’m not thaaaat cute,” Buttons hid his blush as he whined.

       "You're adorable," Blink said.

       “Nu-uh, no I’m not,”

       "Too adorable," Mush laughed as Buttons whined, hiding his face in JoJo’s shoulder.

       JoJo sighed. "I have to admit, he's the most adorable besides Elmer,"

       “Not you toooooo,” Buttons groaned refusing to look at anyone.

       "You and Elmer are tied," Romeo said.

       “I don’t understand how you guys think I’m cute,”

       "It's collective that our mom is adorable,"

       “You wouldn’t think that if you saw the rest of me..." Buttons muttered inaudibly.

       Mush and Blink looked at each other. "Buttons?”

       “Yeah?” Buttons signature smile was back in an instant, but it didn’t light up his eyes the way it usually did tipping everyone off.

       "Buttons? What's wrong?" Blink asked.

       “Nothing,” Buttons demeanour flipped from soft and vulnerable to ‘perfectly okay’ his smile hollow as he tried to look okay.

       JoJo looked at Blink and handed Buttons over. They were better at this than him.

       Buttons tilted his head looking at JoJo with what he hoped was a confused look getting only a sympathetic one in return.

       “What’s wrong? You guys all look real serious all of a sudden?” Buttons asked trying to play the oblivious role he knew well.

       "We're worried," Mush said softly.

       Why? Did something happen?” Buttons quietly prayed they would believe the lie that he was fine and let it go.

       "You said something," Blink whispered.

       “No, I don’t know what you guys are talkin bout, I was jokin about not bein cute and then you went and got all serious,”

       "You are adorable, but you said..."

       “I don’t understand how you guys think I’m cute? I didn’t say nothing after that” Buttons pretended to be confused, trying to hide his fear.

       "I heard something. Ears are good," Blink tapped his ear for emphasis as he spoke.

       “Well, I didn’t say nothin so it must’ve been something else,”

       "Buttons, I heard you saying 'You wouldn't think that if we saw the rest of you',"

       Buttons smile dropped for a moment revealing a look of terror for a second before his walls went back up. “Nope, I didn’t say that musta heard wrong,” Blink pulls him into a tight hug. He never wanted to see that expression on Buttons' face. He nuzzled into the hug letting his facade drop, and trying to keep from crying, Mush soon joining and smushing the scared boy. It took all of Buttons effort not to show his true emotion, the warmth from the hug made him want to break down, but he couldn’t, it would end terribly, boys don’t show emotions.

       "Do you wanna go somewhere more private?" Mush asks gently.

       Buttons nodded softly not wanting to give in to his pathetic side that wanted to be vulnerable, giggling slightly as Mush picked him up. He wrapped himself up in their blanket as soon as they got to their bed, making no attempt to get either to cuddle.

       "Buttons, what's wrong hon?" Blink asked, sitting beside Buttons.

       “Nothin I’m fine,” Buttons shrugged

       "I know that isn't true," Blink said softly.

       “Why’s that?”

       "You looked terrified," Mush answered joining his boyfriends.

       “When? I ain’t scared of nothin so why would I look it?” ‘Boys don’t get scared, don’t show feelings, they make you pathetic’ his mind repeated.

       "Because you were. It's okay to be scared,"

       “Nope,”

       "I get scared," Blink offers.

       “You...you do?” Buttons was honestly confused now, Blink wasn’t weak so he couldn’t get scared.

       "Mostly of the dark. And spiders,"

       “But... that doesn’t make sense,”

       "It's a weird fear,"

       “No I mean it don’t make sense that you get scared, you can’t get scared, you is nowhere close to bein weak and pathetic, so how do you get scared?” Buttons scrunched his eyebrows trying to connect the pieces.

       "Because the dark is scary, and have you ever seen a spider?"

       “No you don’t get it, you ain’t pathetic so you can’t get scared, only people like me get scared,”

       "Everyone gets scared,"

       “Nu-uh only people who are too weak and pathetic to deal with what’s happenin get scared,”

       "I'm also terrified of the dark, it's scary and stuff," Mush admitted hoping to prove their point.

       “No, no, that-that ain’t right,”

       "Babe, it's okay to be scared,"

       “No, it’s not, boys don’t get scared,”

       "Yeah they do," Mush says gently. "I get scared, Blink gets scared, Jack gets scared, everyone gets a little scared,"

       “But, that don’t make sense,” Buttons stared at his lap, his eyebrows furrowed as he tried to comprehend what his boyfriends were saying. He tensed as Blink hugged him lightly, leaning into the contact nonetheless to hide how weak he was.

       "It's okay to be vulnerable," Blink says softly.

       “Uhhhh no it’s not, vulnerable is how you get hurt,”

       "Vulnerable is how people become stronger,"

       “Vulnerable means you’re pathetic, and pathetic means you get hit,”

       "Sweetheart," Mush gently lifted him into his lap. "No.. Not anymore,"

       “Yeah you is right that’s in the past anyway,” Buttons shrugged, forcing a smile back onto his face, His boyfriends only held him tighter, “It don’t matter,”

       "It does..."

       “Why?”

       "Because it affects you," Blink said.

       “So why does it matter ta you?”

       "Because we care a lot about you,"

       “Why?” Buttons repeated.

       “You’re our boyfriend,”

       “Yeah, but why would you care about _me_?”

       "Because you're you. We care about _you_ ,

       “Yeah but why? I’m messed up, you guys have to take care of me half the time, why would you care about someone as pathetic as me?” Buttons tried to get them to see how bad he was for them.

       "Because you're Buttons and we wouldn't have you any other way. You're our Buttons, everyone else can keep theirs, we want _you_ ," Mush booped his nose lightly, smiling.

       "Okay, I still don’t get it but okay,” Buttons slowly relaxed into it deciding that he may as well enjoy it before he gets hurt, slowly letting himself feel safe in their arms as they muttered reassurances.

       Mush smiled softly. "You're too adorable,"

       “You ’re too adorable,” Buttons repeated.

       "He is pretty adorable," Blink agrees. "And you're adorable,"

       “And you’re hot,”

       "I'm not hot..."

       “Yes, you are we’re not having this discussion again,” Mush shut down Blink's denial.

       Blink sighed heavily. "Fiiiinnnneee,"

       “Glad to see you’ve finally joined us in our beliefs,” Buttons joked.

       "Yeah yeah," Blink laughed.

       “Ya know you love the compliments,” Mush teased.

       "I do," Blink admitted.

       “And you blush super dark and it’s the cutest thing,” Buttons added.

       Blink blushes harder. "Stahhhppp,"

       “Never,” The two answered in unison.

       “I love you Blinkie,” Mush said kissing his head.

       "Love you too Mushy," Blink mumbled into his shoulder.

       Mush rolled his eyes fondly kissing his boyfriend again “What did I ever do to have you in my life?”

       "Existed,"

       “Are you implying we’re soulmates Blinkie?”

       "Possibly. You and Buttons,"

       “You two for sure, I’m just lucky enough that you want me around in this lifetime,” Buttons added.

       "If Blink is my soulmate, so are you," Mush said.

       “Whatever you say Mushy,” Buttons rolled his eyes as Blink hissed the top of his head. “We should probably head back to the main room, I don’t want the guys to be worried about me any longer,”

       "Okay. C'mon sweetheart,"

       They walk into the living room Buttons looking honestly happy. “Sorry about that guys, I’m better now,” Buttons apologized pulling JoJo back into his arms, not forgetting about his earlier plight, the boy in question just sighed and cuddled into Buttons, “How’re you doin Jo?”

       "I'm okay,"   

       “How’re _you_ doin Buttons?” Elmer asked

       "I'm okay, what about you El?"

       “I’m good, are you sure you’re okay though, you looked real off earlier?”

       "I'm fine now,"

       “That’s good, do you want to talk about it?” Davey asked trying to remember what Buttons did to help others.

       "Nah, I'm fine,"

       “Alright, but we’re all here for you, support isn’t a one-way street,” Finch said.

       Buttons blushed as Mush kissed him on the cheek. "Muuuuuussshhh..."

       “Buttoooooooooons..."

       "You're too cute,"

       “So are you,”

       “Noooooo, you’re adorable too Nicky don’t put yourself down,”

       "I'm adorable, but so are you. Don't sell yourself short Johnie,"

       “Fiiiiiiiiiine,” Buttons pouted.

       "Oh don't pout,"

       “Make me,” Buttons shot back, a smile quickly forming as Mush kissed him.

       Mush pulls away after a little bit. "There, that fixed it,"

       “Rude you’re not allowed to be that smooth,” Buttons mumbled still bright red with a huge smile.

       "I am allowed to be that smooth, I am that smooth," Mush smiles.

       “It’s unfair,”

       "But you get to hear it,"

       “Still it makes me blush it’s unfair,”

       "Okay, that's fair,"

       “If you were Spot and Race this is the point when I’d tell you to get a room but you are far too innocent for us to worry about that yet,” Albert commented rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

       "Well we could," Buttons said making Mush groan in annoyance.

       “You only say stuff like that to torment me don’t even pretend you don’t,”

       "I don't!" Buttons bats his eyes.

       “You barely even initiate a kiss let alone anything more,”

       "Mushie," He pouted trying to look innocent.

       “Buttons..."

       "Well, initiation is my thing," Blink smirks.

       “Shut up Louis,” Mush playfully smacked him on the arm. Buttons froze, feeling like he’d just been thrown into a frozen lake.

       “You okay sweetheart?” Mush asked.

       Buttons nodded weakly.

       “What’s wrong baby?” Mush asked again

       “Honey?” Blink asked as Buttons ignored them.

       "It's nothing," Buttons said in a small voice.

       “It’s not nothing, honey, you can talk to us,”

       "It's nothing," Buttons insists.

       JoJo made a face before turning and whispering in Buttons ear so that no one else could hear “is it that Mush hit him?”

       Buttons visibly flinched, but he nodded ever so slightly.

       “It’s okay, do you want me to hug you?” JoJo asked just as quietly giving him a tight hug after getting the okay, muttering reassurances to the scared boy. “It’s all right Buttons I’m here for you, you’re safe”

       Buttons whimpered into his shoulder, failing to hide his fear.

       “What’s wrong?” Mush asked only receiving a glare from JoJo.


	7. I’m Not Okay (I Promise)

       “I don’t know what I did Lou, I mean all of a sudden he just started avoidin' me, he won’t even talk to me, it’s been like a week since I last held him in my arms,” Mush kicked a rock as he spoke, staring at his shoes.

       “I don’t know Nicky, he’s been the opposite with me, pretty much always cuddlin' me, and he seems to not let me beside you, always tryin’ to stay between us,”

       “And now I think Romeo’s mad at me, he was glarin’ at me yesterday, I just, don’t know why,”

       “Talk ta him bout it,” Blink shrugged, pulling him into a hug as soon as the front door of the lodge closed behind them.

       “Yeah, you’se right I will,” Mush smiled sadly, kissing Blink on the cheek before wandering off to find Romeo.

       “Hey Ro, can I talk to ya?” Mush asked poking his head in the door where he and Buttons were.

       “Sure,” Romeo replied, gently lifting Buttons head off his lap trying not to wake him.

       “I feel like you’se mad at me…”

       “I don’t think I’m the one you should be talkin' to about it,”

       “Well, I don’t know what to do...Buttons is avoidin' me and I don’t know what I did and now you seem mad at me and I know I did somethin' but I don’t know what,”

       “You really don’t know do you?” Romeo asked, his glare falling.

       “No,”

       “Yeah I guess that would make sense it was such a little thin', the other night, well I guess it was like a week ago now when you playfully hit Blink on the arm, it scared him, he thinks you hurt him,”

       “Oh god, I didn’t even think,” Mush choked out, tears falling from his eyes.

       “Hey hey, you didn’t realize it okay, just give him space,” Romeo pulled him into a hug.

       "Yeah, yeah you’se right, okay, I’ll go talk to Blink and tell him what’s up,”

  


       “What are you two thinking?!” Romeo whisper yelled.

       “What are you talkin' about?” Blink asked

       “You’ve barely talked to Buttons in the last three days,”

       “He’s avoided us,”

       “Because he thinks you hate him because you were tiptoein' around him! He’s scared,” Romeo's brows furrowed as he tried to get the point across.

       “Well duh he’s scared of me!” Mush’s voice broke slightly as he spoke.

       “You really don’t get it do you?”

       “Get what?”

       “He thinks he did somethin' wrong and that you don’t want him any more, he was sobbing for hours last night because he wanted to leave so you guys could be happy but the only place he could go was back! He thinks he ruined your relationship! He is convinced that it’s only a matter of time until everyone else hates him too! He hasn’t smiled in a week…” Mush sank to his knees as Romeo finished, shame washing over him in waves. “He needs you, you can’t keep shuttin' him out like this,” he sat next to Mush pulling him into a hug, “you got this Mush, I believe in you, he wants you back more than you could imagine, they’re gonna be back soon, you guys got this, get your boy back,” Romeo assured, squeezing Mush tighter before getting up and leaving the room. 

       “Oh my god Race! You can’t just say that without context!” Buttons yelled through his giggles, his voice growing louder as he neared the room.

       “It’ll be okay,” Blink reassured, taking Mush’s hand.

       Buttons smile fell as he walked into the room, B-lining towards his belongings.

       “Buttons?” Mush asked nervously.

       “Yeah?” He stayed facing the wall, refusing to look at them.

       “Can we talk to you?”

       ‘This is it they hate me they’re going to break up with me and tell me they hate me and they want me to leave’ “Of course what’s up?”

       “It’s not bad promise,” Blink said knowing how nervous he gets.

       “I know I messed up Buttons I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you and sure as hell not push you away,” Mush said softly

       “You don’t gotta apologize, it’s my fault anyways,”

       “No honey it’s not,”

       “I was annoyin' you, that’s why you pushed me away, it’s fine I get it,” he shrugged turning to look at them, schooling his expression.

       “No, I was scared you’d be scared of me,”

       “You were?” Buttons asked, confusion breaking through his mask.

       “You looked terrified when Mush was in the room,” Blink said quietly.

       “He hit you…”

       “It wasn’t a real hit, it was playful, like roughhousing,”

       “Still I didn’t want you to be hurt,” Buttons mumbled.

       “It’s okay,” Blink said, Buttons just pouted, feeling awful for jumping to conclusions.

       “Hey, don’t pout,” Mush smiled softly.

       “I assumed the worst of ya, you’ve done nothin but be amazin' and I just…”

       “Hey it’s okay,” Blink sat next to him, “it’s okay,”

       “Okay…”

       “Can I hug you?” Blink asked holding his arms out, smiling as Buttons nodded, throwing himself into his arms and burying his face in his shoulder.

       “C’mere Nicky,” Buttons said after a minute.

       Mush stood up and hugged Buttons lightly, scared of holding him too tight.

       “How did I ever think you would hurt someone?” Buttons asked, shifting so he could hug Mush tightly. “God I missed this…”

       “So did we,” Blink mumbled into his hair.

       “You guys is amazin',”

       “So are you,”

       Buttons eventually leaned back, wiping the tears from his eyes as he smiled.

       “You okay love?” Mush asked

       “No,” Buttons laughed with a watery smile, “it’ll be a long time before I’m okay, but I’m happy,”


End file.
